Monday, July 14, 2008

Getting closer....

Well, only 16 more days until the surgery. On day 6 of my 3 week liquid diet and it is difficult. One of the most challenging things I have ever done. I love food, and I miss it. As my surgery date draws nearer, I am still filled with fear. I am doing my best to stay positive. I love my life. I love my family. Carl is the most wonderful man in the world. I love my children more than life itself. I trust God will take care of me. If anything were to happen to me. I need Carl, Cody and Lily to know that they are the most important things in the world to me. I made Carl promise that if something were to happen that he would make sure that Cody stays in Lily's life forever. I know he will honor my wishes. I believe in him. I hate having panic anxiety, it makes me have all these crazy thoughts. I am scared about doing this, but, also at peace because I know I need to lose the weight so I can be around for a lot longer! It is such a conflicting feeling. Carl, Cody and Lily my love for you is so deep and so strong that mere words cannot express the feeling. xoxo